Empowering Your Deep Healthy: "It’s All About YOU, Not Me"

Oddly enough, within a 24hr span I had this exact converastion with two different clients. However, I was glad it happened as this is something to discuss, point out and share with others because THIS exact mindset is a barrier to YOUR deep health.

Client #1: "Whatever is easier for you"

Some of my clients utilize an online tool as a somewhat hybrid form of coaching via an app/website. Late last year I discussed with my clients about switching over to a different one to which they all were open to trying. I reminded them at that time (and subsequent discussions following) that if at any time they would rather jump back to the first app I used, then we'll do so.

Client #1 as we'll call them has had lots going on in their weeks and months since the fall of 2024, and consistency has fallen off compared to early to mid 2024. As we continue to work slowly back to finding consistency within their change of daily stressors etc, there was a very evident lack of use of the new online tool over several months. My plan was to discuss this with the client on this particular morning, yet they brought it up first. The client mentioned, "I prefer the previous app we were using, but whatever is easier for you". I took that opportunity to remind the client of two things:

1) We've discussed multiple times if the new tool was an issue, just say the word and we can switch (so I'm happy it was brought to my attention).

2) This has nothing to do with what's easier for ME (the coach)

Client #2: "If it's easier on you..."

This client and I do a weekly phone call where we chat healthy lifestyle practices, positives and struggles over the past week in regards to their health habits etc. Recently the client asked if I could check-in with them daily, via text message, as they've really been struggling lately. "Absolutely!" was my reply.

During our call after the first week, I wanted to be sure the client still wanted the daily check-ins to which the client replied: "Well, if it's easier on you to do every other day, that's fine..." To which I replied;

1) It's not about ME

2) I can do whatever helps you right now

Following those reminders, the client (quite quickly) said; "Ok, yes please continue the daily check ins"

Let's Do a Check-In Together Right Now

• YOU (my client) have hired me (your health and wellness coach / professional) for guidance in creating healthy lifestyle practices to positively impact YOUR deep health.

• YOU have made this decision with YOUR deep health in mind.

• YOU choose to create the change, based on the discussions, information and guidance YOU and your coach discuss.

NOTHING here is about the coach. Clients (hopefully) do not hire me to ensure my life is easier, or great, or healthy.... or whatever. It's not about the coach!

The more a client continues the habit of putting "someone else before themselves" (in this case, their coach), the harder it will be to create positive change within their own deep health. Many of us are already too good at putting others before our own health.

Reality Check

I am nearly at the quarter-century mark, working with people and their wellbeing. 😳 Here's what I can tell you from the coach's perspective:

• Yes I love my job. But it IS a job. There are pros and cons like any other kind of work. There are good days and bad days like any other career.

  
  

• Everyone needs something different; Things just seem to balance out. Sure one client may need a little more in regards to check ins or attention, but another will want/need less. Regardless, it's my job to help the client in the best way I can - which ultimately is what works best for them.

  
  

• The "ease of my day" is NOT up to the client; That's up to ME! It took over two decades for me to figure it out, but my time and energy is well protected now. That means I create my own EASE / FLOW to my days. No one else. It's works on the same principle with the client; As much as the client does not need to concern his/herself with the "ease" of my days/time (I'll protect and manage that myself), the coach cannot "make" the client do anything they don't want to do (no matter how healthy it may be).

  
  

• My job is to help THE CLIENT, not myself. Health & Wellness Coaches provide a service. And a service is there for the client - not the coach.

The Problem...

I truly feel that the problem is, many of us don't know WHAT we want BECAUSE we are constantly putting our own deep health last. Think about it - my clients pay me for a service and professional guidance, but then worry about things being "easy on me"?? The person they paid for a service?? That's wonderful, don't get me wrong, but it's counterproductive big time don't you think??

The bonus about my services is that I get to help people on a deep level. That's never stopped being so cool! However, I can't do MY job if YOU are constantly putting YOURSELF last, and spending the energy worrying if something is "easy" on the coach or not. I need to know what YOU need from me, not what you think I need as your coach. If I can't do something that's being asked, my clients know I'll tell them. If it's unrealistic of an ask in some way, we will chat to find a way to make it work through discussion(s). Either way, the goal is to benefit YOU, the client. The way to help people in my line of work, is communication and working together not me as your coach pointing a finger and saying "do this or else!"

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This is what working with a Health & Wellness Coach can bring you that general programs (online or otherwise) cannot. Working with a Coach (whether a check-in once a month or a couple session times per week) puts YOU as the priority.