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Nobody "should" do anything. Everyone CAN do anything, but no one "should" do anything.
Are you with me??? Or have I lost you?? LOL
I had a wonderful conversation with one of the ladies in the Women's Health & Lifestyle Groups I run bi-weekly.
-This woman is in her 60's
-Diabetic
-Osteoarthritis
-Is trying to lose weight
-Cares for her elderly father
-Cares for others in her home as well (as any mother/spouse does)
Her son, in his early 30's who goes to the gym regularly and has been losing weight told her she "should" be on a protein powder.
She asked me after our session my thoughts on protein powder. As we discussed things, I asked "why do you feel you 'should' be on protein powder?". Other than "because my son told me I should be", she said "because I 'should' eat more protein". I then asked her, "Ok - how much protein are you taking in each day?" To which she shrugged saying "I'm not sure".
The "Should" Trap
Someone says we "should" do something or take something...
We then get into the self-talk telling ourselves we "should" do or take that thing...
We become REACTIVE; We go do that thing or start taking that thing, without knowing if it's for us, without thinking whether it's something we WANT/NEED to do and without knowing ourselves completely FIRST!
... Back to the conversation:
In this woman's case I reminded her there are several factors at play here to first consider:
1) There's a 30 year difference in her physiology vs her son's physiology
2) They each have different goals (with some similarities mind you) and reasons for their own goals
3) She has additional health conditions to consider BEFORE buying some random supplement
4) She has different daily responsibilities and roles that need to be factored into her goals and what works for her
5) She (and her son) don't actually know if she's getting "enough" protein in each day or not
6) Does she want to pay $40-$50+ for a decent protein powder every month?
7) Does she want to rely on a supplement (she may or may not need) rather than food/meals?
These are all things that can be considered before jumping into a supplement that may or may not be necessary. **
**Reminder - Supplements are there to SUPPLEMENT our diet. It "fills the gaps" of a healthy diet. If you're foundational nutrition practices aren't in place (which is most of us) a supplement won't be any magical secret to unveil superhero health levels
Know YOURSELF rather than being REACTIVE
We get "should" on all the time, from all angles (especially from those who care about us - understandably). However, we need to be less reactive and learn how to better understand OURSELVES.
In this case, I recommended to this woman to take a step back. First of all, we don't "have" to be on a protein powder. Let's first sort out "Does she even lack in daily protein". We discussed the Precision Nutrition "hand method" for gauging portion sizes that we discussed in our sessions back in the spring of this year, so she's aware of a very simple way to gauge her protein intake. I suggested she writes down how many servings of protein she's getting with this method per day, for 2-3 days. THEN we can make a more INFORMED decision of where to go from there (in conversation and action).
I've shared several thoughts and posts regarding SLOWING DOWN in various aspects of our daily lives. This mindset includes SLOWING DOWN ON "SHOULDING" - Both ourselves AND others.
Let's begin to practice being MINDFUL of the fact that we are ALL INDIVIDUALS. What works for one, won't necessarily work for another. There's MANY factors at play.
Approaching your nutrition, fitness, recovery, sleep and all aspects of your deep health without "shoulding" yourself or others, will allow you to discover what truly works for YOU.
I'm very happy that this woman was comfortable enough with me to ASK and CHAT about things BEFORE jumping into anything (whether it's right for her or not). Especially with health conditions that MUST be taken into consideration in these cases. At the very least if I'm able to slow someone's 'reactiveness' down, I'm happy. At least then in this case, she can take a step back and not rush into a decision so that she can think more about what SHE wants, what SHE needs and what works for HER.